Back to Kenosha "on writ." The nurses are both refusing to do the initial medical screening of inmates in the intake cells. Myself and a lot of other guys are forced to wait six hours or longer for second shift medical staff to come in at 6:00pm. I end up waiting in the holding cell from about 12:30pm until 10:30pm. No phone call because first shift jail staff told second shift that we were provided calls when we actually were not. In response to one of the inmates getting upset about it the guards strip him down and put him in a padded "turtle suit." It was all antagonized by medical refusing to do theirs. One nurse was just standing with her arms crossed and refusing to try to help any inmates just because the other nurse had not bothered to have started. That was at 3:00pm with three more hours on her shift, not a single one of us was seen. Still, after three years of being mistreated, it bothers me to suffer the intentional or negligent consequences.

People think that criminals are the greatest detriment to society but if anyone was to happily deprive them of ten hours worth of income or delay them from going home for ten hours of any day and equate that to a dollar amount, I would suppose the greater damage would be by the people who hold positions of power or authority that use their position maliciously.

​When they open the door to send me to the housing unit, after hours of my asking to make a phone call, corrections officer DiCello offers to let me use the phone to which I decline as I don't wish to disturb anyone that late at night. The phones had been available for hours and it was just so obviously malfeasance. Another day without a call. 

After submitting some requests I have legal access every week day for about 50 minutes. I cannot look up any of my own court appointments whatsoever. I have court on next Wednesday, after the holiday and cannot communicate with wherever I have court. Is it really legal access if I don't know who to address or the details in or of the issues to be discussed? Maybe this system was minimally adequate some time ago but when the pride is set on being an inconvenience and obstructionist, then it seems to me that reasonable accommodations are quickly dismissed or neglected for any convenient excuse. If authorities take away your ability to protect and defend your rights they have no compulsion to continue them. The first thing any people should obligate of its government is the requirement to protect the rights of citizens. I would suppose that is theoretically in place with an oath, but from what I have experienced oath takers only use oaths to give their lies greater influence. It doesn't appear to make people any more or less honest. Well, maybe it makes some people more inclined to lie because their lies then benefit them. 

I had read many old books that were freely available on the tablet service while in jail. One book, if I remember right, was about injustices perpetrated in the late 1800s or early 1900s. Many of the books available were printed in the early 1900s so the license was free for the books to be redistributed. In the book there was a story about a black man who was wrongfully accused of raping a woman. Many people from the town set out to find the man. Although the man was found and exonerated, a faction of the mob that had formed had taken to attacking any black man they could find. Most of the story I remember vaguely, and perhaps inaccurately, but the part that struck me was that the mob had beat an innocent man almost to death, and while he lay in the street, helpless to defend himself, a guy walks up to him and stands over the guy and shoots him dead. Then he turns to the crowd and says something like "I shot the n*****! I got him!" And this all gets reported in the newspaper. And the man who was actually accused, I think he was cleared of the allegation. When I read things now, certain things jump out at me and I will write down quotes and wisdoms I call "gems." Other themes and situations seem to habitate my mind now too. In whatever vagueness that story stuck with me, whenever people's very unjustifiable behavior is exhibited to their own malice or negligence, I often think "You got him." Whether its guards mistreating inmates or inmates mistreating inmates, or inmates mistreating guards. Whether its investigators doctoring reports or district attorneys office members framing trials? "You got him." When any person "weaponizes law enforcement" by making a false claim by which they eagerly and with obvious prejudice then take action against another person? "You got him."

Someone told me a long time ago that there was a study done that indicated 70% of all domestic violence reports were made by the abuser in some extended effort to control their current or previous partner. If the odds are that a person reporting domestic violence is doing it to manipulate authorities to satisfy their own controlling interest then do the authorities have any obligation to validate a claim before taking action? Otherwise they just become a (negligent) unknowing participant in harming or increasing the harm perpetrated on a victim. What happens when victims are forced to take domestic violence class when it was not them that perpetrated any violence? Well, I will probably just learn the appropriate terminology. Patterns of behavior? How about when a woman is attempting to "recruit" a man willing to harm her ex-relationship and when he does not accomplish the task to her satisfaction then finds a way to recruit the authorities? Wait! I am reporting a horrible crime, but now I need to leave because some reason I will completely contradict by my observable actions. Law enforcement responds: "Whatever you say must be the truth and whatever you do must be innocent." If something like that were to ever really happen then I hope a group of people with some objective sensibility would come together and help undo the mess that foolishness like that would cause. Okay, okay. I will stop... for now. 

When I was arrested I had a few thousand dollars in child care receipts and no child support obligation enforced by the state. I eagerly paid child care, medical, dental, and food costs for my children. Perhaps about eight months in to my incarceration I was in court facing allegations of being a dead beat, non-contributing father to my three kids. Even though I disputed the allegations the guardian ad litem, appointed by the court to supposedly represent my kids' interest in the proceedings, never spoke with me and the court assigned full custody to my kids' mother and established a child support obligation and arrears based solely on the claims by my children's mother. Without any income, support obligations accrued while I remained in custody for more than two more years without any income.

Today I went to family court, now having been wrongfully convicted, to have the obligation adjusted accordingly. When I went to court, I mean that I walked down to the classification department and sat in a tiny booth with a glass door where a shelf held upon it an old style phone with which to participate in the proceedings. I explained to the court that the previous order was made on bad information. My children's mother then espoused more false information to which I was permitted to respond only to be met by her shouting over me. It worked, to minimal benefit. It prevented me from being able to tell the court important information but the inevitable reality is that inmates in maximum security institutions can only make 15-47 cents per hour and are forced to switch jobs every two years to allow other inmates opportunity. I am bothering to write about it because something happened today, at all, and because a few things happened to note. The lies and yelling over me I expected.

What I heard, also, was that here is some other obligation she is collecting from another person every month. Also, she tried to have an amount set based on the fact that money is being raised charitably for an appeal. The other obligation must come from a person with work release at a lower level security institution. She also has an eye on the money being raised and is evidently looking for a means of acquiring that as well.

The court elected to maintain a $25 per month obligation toward arrears to "hold open" the obligation or account or something. They said $25 was "the magic number," is why. So, eventually, when I get to work in here, and when I work my way to 47 cents from 15 cents per hour, restitution will take 50% and child support will then take two and a half weeks of remaining wages to try to satisfy. That is a best case scenario. Maybe I am stick or stupid but I would still do it just to do anything for my kids before I do nothing.

​The most ridiculous part about court was my children's mother insisting there is money somewhere because when my family would put money on my books I would send $20 a month to try to make some contribution to my kids. Someone else identified the money as having been released from the Kenosha jail from my account showing my effort to make any difference to my kids lives. Although my kids' mother scoffed at it being less than $7 per child, and I am embarrassed at how little I can do to help them, I will always look for ways to help my kids. I shouldn't be in here and the best way to help will be to come home, but until then, I need to get to my regular joint and apply for work. 

I forgot to mention that I will be subjected to treatment, err, required to do a program for domestic violence. Because of the nature of the conviction. I maintain my innocence. I wonder what happens, you know, "if" they find out differently. Like, hypothetically, when the truth comes out and it turns out that it was, in fact, the woman who was the abusive one in the relationship? What happens if the victim of domestic violence is accused and convicted of domestic violence when he isn't and didn't? I wonder if and when people would recognize how prejudice and sexist they really are. Like, if a woman plots and schemes with her best friend and one of her new boyfriends to not only frame the father of her children for crimes he did not commit, but also to have people perpetrate severe bodily harm. Who is the one with "criminogenic needs?" I actually don't like that "needs" is used when people do not need to be criminals in almost every conceivable possibility. I wonder what the date was that my attorney filed for me to fight for custody of my kids. I guess I should not comment about why a father might be compelled to file for custody. I cannot see it as being any interest in controlling someone he voluntarily left and refused to live with over a decade prior. Like most things, as long as the prosecution can imagine a scenario, even if it contradicts fact, it will be the scenario sold to the jury and the public. I suppose they just plagiarized from frequent or all too common cases to leverage some believability but I thought thats why facts were supposed to be important. Let's imagine this whatever happened, "maybe." ... "GUILTY!" What?!

I got to talk to a "mentor" this morning about 8:30am. "Down" for 47 years. He had some insight into getting work and staying busy. He was encouraging about keeping a positive attitude. The thirty minute meeting went quickly. I also called my daughter who accepted the call with her mom demanding her attention within a couple minutes of my calling. I advised her to decline if it isn't a good time for fifteen minutes to talk. I wished her goodbye after telling her I loved her as soon as I heard the all too familiar hostility in her mother's voice. I cannot be there to make anything better and definitely don't want anything to be worse for my kids. Then, about 10:00am, I go to staffing. Very frustrating to hear the authorities peddle more lies. In the report the staffing agent read to me, it said a number of things that were patently false, including a claim that the missing guy was disposed of in some deep quarry and that I put GPS trackers on people's vehicles. The false claims continued to be promulgated and I am defenseless. Having attorneys has so far proven ineffective and there is no way to shield myself from the collateral damage of all of the repercussions of a wrongful conviction. When I refuse the details of what she is reading she tells me that she is just reiterating information in the document sent to her and I could probably request a copy from the court. I explain to her that a lot of people have strong feelings about the case and that I have been told it is probably going to be an issue with people reportedly saying they will be looking to fulfill their or my "destiny" when they catch up with me in prison. I don't have many "government" names so she says there isn't anything that she can do about were I go or who I am housed with. Well, fine. I mean probably not, but my safety is the least of anyone's concern that work in the justice system so it isn't a shock. The only thing I am thinking about at the moment is how many inmates have heard of what corrupt Kenosha did to me and offer me some type of friendly greeting or acknowledgement when they see me. Although I didn't write about it, yesterday, I had gone to legal access to get some things sent to my attorney and a guy with a shaved head and impressive beard sat down next to me. He commented about an appeal and said he was in Kenosha on the day of my sentencing. I saw him again today when he was at clinic and nodded a hello. I don't know what strangers will collect affinity but I cannot deny what great people it has made part of my life and am hopeful that there will be enough good people wherever they send me. If not, I will do my best, come what may. 

It is warm and a little uncomfortable in these cells without air conditioning. The neighbor in cell 48 (I am in 49) gets a new cellie today. This evening they get into it because the new guy took all his clothes off but his underwear. It made the guy who already occupied the cell very uncomfortable and he complained. Comparatively, exiting the showers without having clothes on is a ticketable violation. When the inmate complained, however, they ended up taking him to the hole. Perhaps I had missed some detail about their exchange, but when they removed the complainer the guy yelled "ha ha!" really obnoxiously which clearly indicated he was doing it to be antagonistic. It just seemed so backwards that they force an inmate to cohabitate with another that strips down to his underwear and the guy that gets punished is the one who is uncomfortable in the confined space. Is that not somehow backward? So weird. It isn't something that happened to me, but being locked in a cell doesn't offer much action. Well, unless you are interested in a cellie that doesn't wear clothing.

I got a couple messages today! I think it was Tuesday and now Friday I got some messages. Huge highlight to my day. People just really could not possibly understand how big of a difference it makes. There are still some people that I am eager to hear from who have not contacted me yet. Perhaps they expect me to but I don't have many addresses and the phone is my only option to contact my daughter at the moment. With these infrequent calls, I do not end up with many extra that aren't otherwise necessitated for legal communication with family. I am sure they can tell you how most calls are a fifteen minute monologue of things that need to be done. Very little time to just chat. They know I love them and would not ask for things I did not need. I am really looking forward to getting to my regular joint to get more phone time though.

I heard that after two years of pay scale progression, a prison inmate job you can max out at 47 cents per hour. 50% of all incoming money goes to restitution and court costs. 10% goes to a trust fund set aside for release and 25% is attributed toward child support. The guys in here say "you are 85%" when you have child support obligations. I have no idea how taxes affect prison income but in two years I should be able to earn $18.80 per paycheck and have $2.82 left for me to use. That is less than three calls per week. Maximum pay potential will require two and a half weeks just to cover the cost of going to see the dentist or doctor/nurse with the $7.50 copay. That is interesting that if an inmate gets sick or needs his teeth cleaned that he cannot afford to call his family while working full time on behalf of the institution. And the tis the MOST we can make? As long as inmates feel that working hard is not going to offer them a way to take care of themselves and their family, then how would they be willing to reform or rehabilitate? I cannot make any sense of this system. 15 cents per hour to start out. Wisconsin Penal System: How to do as little as possible, burden tax payers, and what? disenfranchise some significant percent of the population to essentially slavery? Indentured servitude? Which is basically using debt to effectuate slavery from what I remember of history class. Having been stuck in jail for three years with no practical way to pay toward child support, I think I owe about $18,800 (for simplified math). When I make the maximum achievable pay rate, it will then take 40,000 hours to pay off (at 100% of the income) the debt completely. Assuming I never go to the doctor or need to pay for a phone call, or buy a new toe nail clipper, then I think I could almost get it in about 20 years. Except court costs and fees, and a stack of "DNA surcharges" that are applied for each charge. Why each charge? Because they can. It's not like the DNA isn't already collected but someone opened the door for convicts to be preyed upon with that as well. At the prescribed rate, it will take 40 years because it is split in half with the other obligations. No wonder people commit more crime. All the really smart people can't solve recidivism? I would say the people who have designed and implement this system are more concerned with making sure people will always be criminals. I am seeing quickly and easily how the success of the system is not about "corrections" but about exploitation. 

I saw a hawk glide across the sky this morning. Where are my boys at?! It is hard to sit and wait for all the fraudulent fabrications from the case to be properly addressed. I spend a lot of time thinking about how the trial was not about the truth but about selecting some information, taking it out of context and suggesting to the jury what the prosecutions imagination hoped was true. It never really left the investigatory stage before the prosecution got involved, but instead of following facts they married themselves to rumor and gossip. What happens when a prosecution and its investigatory counterparts change evidence and testimony after the original facts were collected? It cripples a defendants ability to acquire help. The damage is really pervasive to everything. Righting this wrong is not just a matter of time lost and all the inconvenience. The harm to my children will be permanent. They will be different people for the rest of their grandchildren-not-yet-born's lives. All for the convenience and negligent satisfactions of some corrupt authorities. Even worse, I cannot tell people what isn't true or it may ruin my chance for an appeal. History, once written, in many ways is impossible to correct. Against the difficulty of changing peoples minds after first impressions are wrong, and the inclination for people to believe what they want to believe and how that somehow supersedes facts, it is all irreversible damage in so many ways. 

When I read books or watch movies now, certain quotes tend to catch my attention. The latest quote: "There are none so blind as do not wish to see." I wish that quote continued about what people will do to convince people they are right by sacrificing integrity. One of the scariest moments in the trial was the judge smiling while talking about how he doesn't worry about what the appellate court thinks of his decisions. To me it sounded like his admitting the case was foul but he was going to do his part to help the District Attorneys office secure a wrongful conviction. Especially after numerous decisions that indicated that interest as well as his reiteration of a quote that he got from a judge who was his neighbor when he was young. I don't remember exactly, but: "The brain cannot absorb what the seat cannot endure." So when he let the prosecution exhaust the two week plan, including a snow day where it barely snowed at all, and an afternoon off for him to go with his wife to the doctor, and the defense witnesses are then unavailable to participate in the trial and the jurors are a week beyond expectation, it really presses a finger on those scales of justice. Perhaps the blindfold on the woman that holds the scales of justice is tied by the judge so he can get away with that kind of stuff. A more complete history and record makes it obvious. 

Second day in a row without access to make a call. Dan, my old cellie, and resident of cell 50, says that the guard told him the the supervisor makes them stop the phones during other activities. Because there are a lot of inmates in this unit taking medication we are deprived of phone access. It really is any excuse to deprive us of access. Even if a guy is yelling out of his cell they will "slow down" the phones. Childish bullying and harassment before paperwork. It feels like it makes about as much sense as a driver break checking someone following too close and how it forces everyone to jam the breaks and the freeway gets that hard congestion during rush hour. Like two wrongs have ever made a right. My kids should not be denied my call because the guards just feel like being assholes. Even worse, they finish with passing out medication at 8:15 to 8:35pm. Even though our last standing count is at 9:15pm, or that the lights don't get turned down until 9:00pm. So they are doing "med-pass" about an hour early and putting us to bed so they don't have to do anything for an hour of their shift. I suppose if I complain there will be some sort of retaliation by the supervisor who was all huff n' puff on June 3rd. I could try explaining to my kids that more than one call a month is considered a privilege. It makes no sense to be convicted and punished for crimes I did not commit. It makes no sense to punish my family as well. The justice system just seems like the embodiment of not doing the right thing. 

I go to where they have booths set up for video conferences to attend family court. I sit there for an hour before finding out that they rescheduled to the 27th. 

Rec cancelled.

My cellie gets moved to another unit today. He is supposed to be going to a drug abuse program and will be done with the sentence in about 4 months. I get a new cellie, who is a young guy in his mid-twenties. It seems like we will get along well enough for the temporary living situation we are in. I get my PREA re-screen today. I enter the room and sit down in the chair, clap my hands down on my thighs and proclaim that I have been molested every day since I have been here. She could tell I was not serious and we both laughed. Probably an inappropriate joke but it was better than the serious versions of those meetings. She mentioned it would be way too much paperwork and waived me out with a smile.