October 23, 2023

I have this feeling that someone will read yesterday's entry and suppose me unwanting or ungrateful, but I appreciate everything people try to send me. I guess my point was supposed to be that the previous guards have used everything a person could possess as an opportunity to try to harm or deprive them. I guess I still feel or expect that sort of treatment which is why I hide the pictures. They aren't even contraband. I have written to a few people that my journal entries are about my experience and not directed at anyone in particular. Maybe I didn't clarify that before, but I try to avoid demonstrating any favoritism because I couldn't have any favorites and some of the things that people have sympathized about, or shared with me are very personal and sometimes very tragic. I don't want anyone to feel belittled, marginalized, or ostracized. There are letters that I certainly look forward to. There are personalities I really want to meet, or eat least speak to over the phone. I hope travel is an option when I finally get out but I will be broke and need to get back to work, so we shall see. Even people that might deserve special thanks and recognition I try to omit from my journal. It is purposeful, out of consideration for everyone who participates and contributes in their own ways and means.