September 27, 2023

My back finally let go. I don't know a better way to describe it. I pass out hard for about four hours. It hurts like usual now. Not the struggle to breathe or really sharp pain. Just that "is my spine bruised?" sort of ache and soreness that I usually rate as a four. It's usually enough to prevent any restful sleep but after being up for days I was exhausted enough. By 2:00pm, I am "back" at my physical therapy again. Dreading the next three or four days but more desperate to realize any sort of improvement.

I don't even know how I am going to respond to the denial of my latest step in the complaint process. Since their procedure is to lie and accept those lies even though they couldn't possibly be truth. As long as it exists in their imagination then I am to suffer the consequences. No help. An advocate that watched the surveillance footage and knew the librarian was lying got hostile with me instead of any possible assistance. It is all just such a scam. "Mine is the only opinion that matters." - Jessie Schneider.

I got two notices today that the publications they withheld for not having receipts (which people wrote to me to tell me the they selected the gift receipt option) require I fill out a disbursement to pay to have them shipped out or in ten days will be destroyed. I don't even know for certain which books it is but if they were shipped incorrectly it should not be my burden. Because they take 87%, four dollars from me is like thirty dollars from my family. I don't have an income but that is how they get their money. Some twisted extortion of inmates loved ones.

​My foolish attempt at getting at least two founds of physical therapy per week did not work out so well. Less than 12 hours after I did my prescribed exercises) since my back let go about 2:00pm), I try to sit up in bed to use the toilet and lightning. 1:43am. I guess that means this is September 28th.