September 28, 2023

On all fours writing how dumb I am. Should have rested longer but the physical therapy prescribes two to three times per week. Now I will really have a hard time falling asleep. So stupid.

Also dumb; when the guards do their rounds they pretend they need to shine a light in your cell to check your well being but they pay so little attention that even with my light on, curled up or crouched on all fours, he still shines the light. He doesn't ask if I am okay or even bother to look. Really it is just a way to harass inmates, probably because someone died and their family sued. That seems to be the history to most policy. Actual participation just goes into the type of person that tenjoys being an ass.

I have always been shocked at how little guards do. If I get a few letters it is usually met with some comment or complaint. Yes, I love trees. Take away practical access to other forms of communicating and more will die. I don't want it to be that way but they will be rude to me as though I was forcing them to go to work. Not all of them. But, many. The guard at Dodge who laughed about lining the inmates up along the chain link fence and waiting for lightning during a storm really captured the resentment in that description. The funny part is that the fence would probably protect the inmates as it is a conductor and divert a lightning strike away. Like a lightning rod, but a whole lot of them. Possibly not if it isn't buried deep enough, but unless they also bury the inmates I think it is very unlikely to work the way he fantasizes. Because to be a guard you don't need any real education and it probably helps you to get the job if you just aren't a good person. That is largely my impression from other places. Boscobel hasn't been so bad yet. This disciplinary issue and no sensible consideration on my complaint about what happened at Dodge doesn't seem right though. Any excuse to ignore or deny my requests. I am being respectful and asking for an honest determination of the facts. History is by those that write it? At this point I am just a ranting, rambling, madman. Or, I probably seem that way. Lets play a game of rock, paper, scissors. Ready? One, two, three, shoot! Who won? Well you can write whatever you want. Best out of three?